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Finally, A Book Read In April

I really got sidetracked with my reading goals this month, as I just finished reading my first book in April--and 13th overall.

I liked In The Land Of NYX: Night And Its Inhabitants by John Bowers. As I consider myself to be more of a night person, I enjoyed reading about the various types of people that work and otherwise stay up through the night, and catch their sleep during the day. It's an older book (copyright 1984), one I picked up at a used bookshop. I can almost smell the age of the book. I don't really have much more to say about the book now. The book shouldn't be faulted for my many starts and stops. That rests with illness, work and a host of other excuses.

I hope, now, that having finished this book, I can right myself again in the reading department.

A Bad Underground Geography Lesson

I spent some time yesterday walking through the underground corridors of the U.S. Capitol. I started out by parking several blocks away from the complex in a residential area near a school, park and interstate. I had a hearing to go to on the House side, which is on the Orange LIne (Capitol South) side of the Capitol.

After that, I had a new press credential to obtain, so, without going outside, I worked my way to the Senate side of the Capitol, which is closer to the Red Line side of the Capitol (Union Station). Essentially, I walked underground from one of the House buildings to the U.S. Capitol building, went up to the wrong floor, got disoriented, and got taken to the wrong press office (I wanted the Senate one instead of the House).

Languages

I'm pleased to read that learning languages doesn't have to belong only to the young. I have, in my possession, language learning tools on the following languages: Dutch, German, Spanish, Korean and French. I think that's it.

In terms of languages other than English, I was, obviously, first exposed to Spanish. My mom, in her efforts to learn English, didn't speak a lot of Spanish to my sisters and I growing up, though in her accented English, mixed in Spanish words--Spanglish if you will.

(I was relating to a friend recently how my mom used to refer to the Spanish word for radishes. For the longest time I only knew what my mom called it, and looking back on it, it's not even the Spanish word for radishes, but the Spanish word for chopped/sliced (pica). That's how the radishes came, in a package that had them already sliced in small bits that she'd include in salads.)

I took a introduction to foreign language course in eighth grade--origins of language, Latin, German, French and Spanish. After that, I took four years of Spanish in high school, a year of French, and have since taken college courses in Spanish and an independent study class in Dutch. I also spent a week in Spain at age 16, and a summer there a year later. I only wish I could have been immersed in Spanish longer, as I think that's the best background for any language learning.

Combine sincere desire to learn and immersion, and I think most of us are well on our way. Without that, it's a bit more difficult, but not impossible. There's plenty of language classes all around here, and if not that, there's plenty who speak other languages that might be able to help as well. That's not mentioning the books, CDs and other language learning tools available. I picked up almost all of my Dutch books in Leiden, and my Korean books/tapes in Seoul. My Spanish books I picked up here, but then again, I could always practice on my mom, but I'd feel weird doing that.

I actually have enough of an understanding to read at a very basic level, and can communicate well enough to figure out whether I'm eating fish, meat, cheese, or drinking wine, beer, or soda. I think if I could spend a year in Spain, or another Spanish speaking country, I'd get fluent. I think I'd struggle in the beginning, but with a longer period of immersion, I'm confident I could learn. I think it's still possible to learn other languagues besides Spanish--those languages in which I don't have a natural background.

I think I'll shoot for Spanish first, and go from there. I do know a few words in the above-mentioned languages, but I'm a lot closer with Spanish, and the pronunciation comes more intutively for me.

Left In The Box

My parents are happy with their new toy--a portable DVD player. It was actually given by my oldest sister to my dad for his birthday.

Mom called yesterday to say how much she was enjoying it, and dad had already told me he'd use it while waiting for mom while she's playing bingo. It'll save him gas by not having to make two trips up and back for her.

Meanwhile, my Christmas gift to them of a stereo sits in a box in their house, and they've yet to say anything about it in the four months they've had it. I thought I was actually getting them something they could use, as their old stereo dates back to the stone age. I know they both listen to music, and they have old records and new CDs that could be played (it's a combo record player/AM-FM tuner/CD player).

I had to hold my tongue last night not to spoil their excitement over the DVD player. The last time I asked them about my gift was well over a month ago. At the time, my mom said she was looking for a place to put it in the house.

Hmmm...

The house isn't that damn big. I think they could have found a place to put it by now.

Guess I shouldn't complain though. You can always give a gift to someone, but it's up to them to figure out how to appreciate it.

Already Thinking About Vacation

With so many travel destinations I long to visit, I'm thinking about the 17 days I'll have off (August 20-September 5, though I could be flexible a day or two either way) and what to do with them. It'll have to be budget conscious, but I think I may be able to get out of the state of Virginia this year.

I'm already wishing I had an extended amount of time off. A friend of mine, Mark, is already talking about his next trip to Vegas. That's his preferred vacation destination, and his next trip with his wife is for a week-and-a-half. He likes it a lot, and he doesn't gamble all the time. He mentioned that I might not like it so much. I remarked, though, that I won't know that until I actually visit the place. It doesn't sound like a place I'd come back to over and over, but I can see myself visiting the Strip at least once.

As for places to visit, I'm not sure. I could do a cross-country drive, or a regional drive in a certain part of the country (not sure which one if I did that; I'm just speculating out loud). I've taken plenty of long car trips, but usually those are all about driving to a certain spot and spending time there, rather than letting the destination be the journey.

I've thought about another trip to the UK. Still plenty I haven't seen there: Ireland, Scotland. And I'd love to go back to London, visit some other areas along the southern coast of England, spend more time in Manchester. I'd enjoy a trip to New Zealand, return trips to South Korea or the Netherlands. I'd love to visit in Scandanavia.

I love to daydream about travel.

As if that wasn't obvious.

Guess I should hit the brochures I picked up at the adventure travel show and look into what I wrote about the places that stood out to me after I returned from it.

This is the kind of thinking I like to do, because it doesn't stress me out. It only starts to become stressful when you realize the means is less than the desire. If my means equaled my desire, I wouldn't be writing this now, and I'd likely be able to start a scholarship fund for the entire planet.

A Family History Lesson

It would take far too long to reconstruct the parts of the family tree my mom was explaining in rapid-fire earlier this evening as she herself was trying to make sense of a couple of conversations she had with her brother in the past couple of days. That, you see, is unusual in itself because usually the only calls she receives from Spain are when something important is going on--birthday, family death. These calls have been neither.

In the process of getting to the point, my mom gave me a long family history lesson, and explained some things that have happened that I hadn't known up until now. This is one of the few times I don't mind lingering on the phone with my mom; I was even taking notes once I realized the direction of the conversation--99 of her words for every one I said. I know precious little about her side of the family, and know that her childhood wasn't the greatest, not just financially, but by how she was treated within her own family.

I'll likely expand on this in the future, but some of what she said still has to sort itself out. I will say that only in this chat with my mom did I learn of something that happened the last time I went to Spain and I was staying in my grandmother's house (she's really my step-grandmother, but she's the only Spanish grandmother I knew).

My mom brought up something that's actually related to the conversations she's had with her brother the past couple of days. She mentioned a heated argument she and my grandmother engaged (more her than my mom, as she recalls) in that another of her brothers walked in on (this back in 1987, the last time either of us were in Spain), and my mom ultimately used some very choice words in telling him what he could do with his comments, because he didn't know what any of it was about. I don't remember any of it.

Every time I hear a story from her life in Spain, I try to picture what her life may have been like, and I can't imagine what it'd be like to be a step-child, poor, and in her situation, and then picking up a little over 20 years into her life and essentially starting a new one.

These things do help me understand her more, and at the same time it adds to the admiration, and confusion.

my mission statement

I think I wrote this after reading a Stephen Covey book, The 7 Habits Of Highly Successful People.  It was, and is, a mission statement I wrote for myself. I dug up a poetry notebook I had and I'm posting some things from it. I'm going to post the mission statement in the way I wrote it, which in true e.e. cummings style, is all in lowercase. I haven't read it in a long time, but I thought it'd be a good reminder for me, something to get me thinking. So, follow along:

Sanctuary

On a four-lane highway a little after dusk:
Driving down the steep hill just before the crucifix,
A wounded deer, jerking motions after the first hit.

In the middle of conversation while taking mom to bingo:
A sharp move to the left to avoid the hunter's game;
Thank God, no other car was in that lane.
Shaken, I drove on.

Seconds before:
The deer was nailed,
Unintentional--
An older man driving a stationwagon
Already pulled over by the time I go past the church.

Going up that hill on the return trip home:
The deer had been sedated, lifeless as it lay in the bed of a pick-up truck.
No flowers, no grave, no name--
Sanguine tears soak the pavement;
A sight unseen by anyone now.

But every day new prey
With hardened stares
Await the blender of steel-belted radials
To pound it into the earth little by little--
Like a human's ashes but without the dignity.

A cat in the turn lane as I approach my street:
The best I can do is avoid its scattered remains
As it dies beyond death.

revised August 19, 1997

Love And Friends

Maybe it's just my own perception, but why is it that we can't tell friends that we love them the way we can tell our family, or a significant other, that we love them?

I don't have many close friends, but of those I consider to be close to me, people I've known for a long time, or sight unseen but with a permanent place within me,

I love you all.

I hope you know who you are.

Is it because we fear that this love somehow will be misinterpreted, particularly with opposite-sex friendships? I'm sure that has something to do with it. I mean, it might get the other person wondering if there's more to that feeling than just one of friendship.

I remember when I was younger saying that I loved someone "in God's way," meaning that we loved that person as a friend, and not as a boyfriend/girlfriend. With Cassie, we usually have a way of closing our letters to each other this way, "miss ya, love ya". I mean, if I just told her I loved her, would she suddenly be weirded out by me saying that, even though I'm clearly not expressing myself romantically, and would any other friend think the same if I said that to them?

It's easy enough, perhaps, for us to say "I love you, mom," or "I love you, dad," or even, "I love you, dear," to the significant other in their life.

And, in the case where it's two guys who are good friends, you aren't going to hear an "I love you," even though that sentiment may well be true, and that's what's in your heart. It doesn't seem as taboo with female/female relationships. Besides, there are plenty of guys who wouldn't mind if the two females were in a romantic love and had that thrust upon their sights.

So, to all my friends, new and long-held, know this much to be true:

I love you.

Sunny Days

It's been warm and sunny here of late, and it'll be over 80 here tomorrow. The last week, though, being knocked out with a cold and various aches, I haven't been able to take advantage. I haven't been feeling up to much other than dimming the lights, curling up in a little ball (no ball is little when you're 6'4" though) and sleeping. I've fallen behind in my reading, cleaning, etc. I did alright in my soccer games this weekend. Being out on the field distracts me from other worries, and we won both our games too.

Anyway, I figure with a day less than a month to go before my 35th year on planet Earth, I'm going to take a better inventory of myself and how I've been caring for all things me. It's not to be selfish, but practical. Everytime I feel I'm making headway in one area of my life, I fall further behind somewhere else. I don't even feel the onset of a mid-life crisis or anything, but it seems appropriate to reassess some things in my life--primarily health and financial related, but it's not to neglect other parts of me as well.

I watched The Notebook last night. It reminded me of a few scenes in my own personal life, and I reflected on that a bit inside the walls of my dark apartment afterwards. Mostly it made me sad ...